The Down-Low

You guys!  Thank you so much for all the love and congratulations!  I've been holding off on making the announcement for reasons about which I'm not even clear.  I've known for 4 weeks now, and it's truly not like me to keep secrets this long; with both girls, the whole world knew within hours of my positive tests.  I mean, BABIES!!  I usually can't not divulge that.

(And so begins the guilt of third-child neglect.  Why didn't you scream MY conception from the rooftops, mom?!)

But it feels different now that everyone knows.  For one thing, I can proudly unbutton my jeans first thing in the morning, loop a rubber band through the button hole, and call it proper attire.  I can squeeze into my favorite long-sleeved t-shirts and not worry that my belly looks like it's filled with too much dinner rather than a tiny baby.  And I do mean tiny; it's still early days, here: 9 weeks, if I've calculated correctly. 

So here's the real nitty-gritty --

::: I'm feeling pretty good.  Definitely not as sick as I was with both girls, although late-nights will find me roaming the kitchen for something to ward off the queasies (but not actually consuming anything because nothing sounds good). 

:::  My cravings, if they can be labeled as such, are all off-kilter from the usual.  You know me, right?  The lover of donuts?  The worshiper of baked-goods?  Blech.  Not interested.  I want salty.  I want...biscuits and gravy.  Spaghetti Red.  Frito Chili Pie.  Twice-baked potatoes.  PIIIIZZZZAAAA.  I want trucker-food, in short, and it has me concerned for my health.  But put a brownie in front of me, and meh.  It feels really weird to admit these things: will I ever go back to normal?!  Sugar, don't desert me now!  (Oh, but the sugar I'm actually in love with right now must come in the form of bright, red berries.  Swoon.)

:::  Justin wants a boy so badly that the color blue is probably bleeding into his irises.  Well, he wants a boy, but he'll be delighted with a girl, he assures me.  He knows what it is to be wrapped up in a little girl's sweet fingers, and more of the same would be fine with him.  But a boy!  A sport!  A ruffian!  An outdoor-pee-er!  Yes, Justin wants a boy.  And the obvious differences in my cravings, combined with the..ahem...timing of conception...makes the possibility of a boy seem not unlikely.

:::  I would love a boy, yes.  But I'm a little afraid of the concept, to be honest.  B...b...boy?  This would equal the toppling of an empire.  The shake-up of the pinkness.  The teeter of the drama-totter.  B...b...boy? 

:::  I look like I'm approximately 5 months pregnant.  This is discouraging, but I trust that my body is all Let's get this show on the road -- I know JUST what to do.  So in support, I'm all Slooooow down, body, let's not be hasty.  You seem to be ready for twins or something...

:::  Which is to say, I'm a little worried it's twins in there.  I feel big.  Round.  (I know, I know...I'll look back and scoff at my declaration of BIG in about 6 months.)

:::  Which is to say, please reassure me that third pregnancies just pop with incredible speed, and the chances of me carrying twins isn't really all that likely...Seriously: reassure me.  (Not that the blessing of two babies at once would be lost on me.  But...just reassure me?)

:::  My first appointment is in a few days so I'll know specifics then, but I believe I'm due in early October.

::: Yawn.  I don't have energy for more right now.  I'd take 4 naps a day if I could.  I'm tired.  I don't remember ever being so sleepy...

::: Snore...